Mercedes GLE 63 S – the maddest ‘SUC’ out there

A sports utility coupe – who came up with that idea? Perhaps BMW, with the ‘squashed’ X6 are to blame. The styling of that car is takes ugly to new limits, so what chance the GLE then?

Well, despite cursing the shape from every angle, it’s difficult not to find this top spec version crazily entertaining. It isn’t the bodywork but what lies under the bonnet that causes a fit of the giggles every time I press the start button.

Forget AMG’s new 4.0-litre V8, this is the old 5.5 with a tank full of torque (like 760 Nm). It’s quite simple the maddest SUV – or SUC – I’ve ever steered. A high-heeled coupe that overtakes everything with a rip-roaring soundtrack.

Wide 22-inch wheels help boost grip and in Sport+ mode it simply flies from the traffic lights.

Inside, there’s the standard issue Mercedes dash – ruined by the barnacle infotainment screen that won’t fold away – great visibility thanks to the extra height but poor rear vision, due to the tiny, tiny screen.

It’s a bit bling, a bit loud and occasionally a bit wild but is there a better way to annoy Range Rover drivers? I doubt it.

 

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A Mini estate with a room on top – neat?

There’s no getting away from the fact the Countryman is an expensive piece of kit, even without the tent in a roofbox.

However, it’s gloriously well equipped inside, with luxurious leather and trim worthy of, well, a car from parent company BMW perhaps.

Hard not to be seduced by such a swish package but just remember what else you can get for this sort of money – a proper-sized family car for example.

And somewhere along the way, Mini has lost the plot over styling. The interior is cool with ‘mood’ lighting but the outside is desperate. The ‘sad’ face front grille says it all. That’s ‘SAD’ in a Donald Trump tweet-type way.

The 181bhp petrol engine should give the Countryman plenty of shove but mated to an automatic gearbox, this particular Mini feels lacklustre. It’s well-behaved at cruising speeds though and feels like a much bigger car.

The roof tent? Well, it works if you enjoy a weekend away and there’s no reason why you can’t transfer it to another car because it rests on standard roof bars.

A neat lifestyle accessory for an expensive, pint-sized SUV.