There’s more than a hint of irony in the fact that the referee from the Uruguay – Italy match has the nickname Dracula. It’s more for the cut of his slicked-back hair than his ability to sink his nashers into unruly players.

I once interviewed a girl who thought she was a vampire, sleeping in a coffin and trying to buy blood from her supermarket – until they found out she was drinking it! Maybe Tesco should sponsor Suarez and cut out the need for him to nibble anyone?

I listened to the Uruguay match in the MX-5 last night. Top down, hurtling around corners and enjoying the Mazda’s sublime handling to the full. There’s something about the low-slung driving position and brilliant chassis that encourages you to push on at every opportunity.

If only the 1.8 engine had a little more power to match the, erm, bite of the handling, this would be the perfect, all-round sports car…