Can we be the first to offer Clarkson a new job as a motoring writer?

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Can I just be the first to offer Clarkson a new job? We don’t pay much but as he only lives down the road from Car Couture I can see it shaping up as the ‘Two Jeremys’. We have long lunchbreaks and there’s always a hot meal in the canteen, day or night.

He would also get to drive fine cars like the Mazda CX-5. Super sensible, packed with equipment and loaded with space.

There would also be plenty of opportunity to moan about some of the features he doesn’t like too. Such as the excessive wind and tyre noise which rather ruins the refinement, plus the annoying infotainment system that isn’t quite up to speed.

No doubt ‘Jezza’ would whine about the keyless ignition which sometimes locks you out of the car, and the rather dull dashboard trim, that isn’t up to BMW standard (although the CX-5 obviously costs less).

It’s more practical than a Ferrari and you can use it to tow a caravan. Yes, right up Clarkson’s street then…

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