Jeremy Clarkson and I have little in common – apart from the first name. He does lives around the corner from me and delivery drivers bizarrely get us confused. Although I don’t earn as much as him, or do double denim.

But we do agree on Maserati Quattroporte. Despite misgivings about his sartorial elegance, JC does agree with me that there’s no cooler executive saloon than a 2009 Quattroporte in black.

Driving back down the M40 from London last night, I could feel eyes watching me as I steered the big Maserati homebound. We passed them all – BMWs, Audi, Mercedes… Nothing stood a chance.

You see, the drivers of all those cars have worked out their benefit in kind tax, their fuel consumption and resale values and been frightfully dull. Whereas the Quattroporte is a massive statement of your determination to be different.

And besides, the v6 diesel was averaging 37mpg. Which isn’t that bad…