You have to look long and hard to find anything about the latest Land Cruiser that screams ‘new’. For us, the big Toyota has all the styling cues of something leftover from the 1980s.

While most of people moved on from permed hair and shoulder pads, the Land Cruiser seems to have got stuck in a timewarp. Compare it to an equally capable Land Rover Discovery and the design looks terribly dated.

Still, the sort of people who should be buying a Land Cruiser (stuck in the Outback of Australia perhaps, or up the side of a mountain in the Alps) won’t mind that.

I just get the feeling that had the design team made the Toyota easier on the eye it could be a more enticing piece of kit…

If the Land Cruiser made a name for itself in one walk of life it would be painted white, trundling across dangerous terrain for the United Nations. The very fact the UN chose the Toyota over a Land Rover says it all about the capability of this rugged workhorse.

We’re blessed with plenty of tarmac in the UK  which means that for most of us there is little opportunity to use the Land Cruiser for what it was originally built for.

Our top spec Invincible model wouldn’t be the best option for serious mud-plugging because it is so expensive to buy. Which is why people who need a genuine off-roader with legendary ability and reliability should look at the entry level Land Cruiser.

It may not have the heated leather seats and media system but I promise you it will take you wherever you want to go…

I’m not sure what the BBC’s definition of a ‘fracas’ is with J Clarkson but I certainly spouted some frustration trying to open the rear of the Land Cruiser today.

Nobody had failed to deliver me a hot steak, messed up my hair or even punched me on the nose – I simply couldn’t find a way to release my hound Malin from the enormous boot.

My fracas almost ended with me reaching for the manual, something we never do at Car Couture. Instead, we believe everything on a car should be well-designed and intuitive.

The handle for opening the side-hinged boot is actually in the recess next to the rear number plate. Ingenious but bloody impossible to find.

Just like those hidden rear-door handles on the Alfa Romeo Giulietta, it’s a little trick you can play on any unsuspecting passenger – ‘find the door handle’.

At least when it is open, the boot space is huge. And you can access the space by opening the rear screen and dropping items in.

Let’s just not have a fracas every time we borrow a Toyota Land Cruiser, OK?

‘Geographical conditions may apply’ – every Land Cruiser sale should come with that tag because whether or not you buy Toyota’s go-anywhere monster might well depend on the terrain where you drive it.

Just like the Land Rover Defender (reviewed elsewhere on Car Couture), the Land Cruiser is best deployed in places where conventional roads are few and far between.

Which means that in this country, the Toyota’s on-road comforts are sadly lacking. You expect a lot of toys for £55,000 but no amount of cabin upgrades can hide the fact that this is a 4×4 built for rougher parts of the world.

Compared to the Discovery and even the Hyundai Santa Fe, the Toyota feels dated and old fashioned. Take it off Tarmac and it’s a different story. So, where do you intend to drive yours?

After a week in Florida, arriving home to a big 4×4 seemed quite normal. However, you soon realise that in the UK, the Land Cruiser is a very big vehicle indeed.

Yesterday we packed off to the Cheltenham Gold Cup and it wasn’t hard finding the Toyota in the car park afterwards. It’s larger than a Range Rover and very easy to spot.

The Land Cruiser looks like a huge SUV, blinged up with LED lights front and rear and a huge chrome grille. I’d be lying if I said it was pretty. The bug-eye headlights might not be to everybody’s taste either.

The interior is a little more appealing, with leather and luxury trim that shouts ‘old school’ rather than Range Rover Evoque avant garde.

The Land Cruiser rather fills the gap between soft SUV and full-on 4×4. Presumably, Toyota thinks this market is still big enough to justify a vehicle like the Land Cruiser…