It’s rude to stare – why the ageing Maserati Quattroporte will get you noticed

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Jeremy Clarkson and I have little in common – apart from the first name. He does lives around the corner from me and delivery drivers bizarrely get us confused. Although I don’t earn as much as him, or do double denim.

But we do agree on Maserati Quattroporte. Despite misgivings about his sartorial elegance, JC does agree with me that there’s no cooler executive saloon than a 2009 Quattroporte in black.

Driving back down the M40 from London last night, I could feel eyes watching me as I steered the big Maserati homebound. We passed them all – BMWs, Audi, Mercedes… Nothing stood a chance.

You see, the drivers of all those cars have worked out their benefit in kind tax, their fuel consumption and resale values and been frightfully dull. Whereas the Quattroporte is a massive statement of your determination to be different.

And besides, the v6 diesel was averaging 37mpg. Which isn’t that bad…

 

What’s the bottom line when you consider buying a Maserati?

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Buying a Maserati comes down to this. You either want to run with the pack and buy German – or you know that a genuine Italian masterpiece will trump anything else in the executive car park.

To be honest, the best of BMW, Audi and Mercedes is better than the Quattroporte. Better at most things – apart from making your toes tingle every time you slip behind the wheel.

The German trio has better engines, better handling and better depreciation. They are benchmark cars that need no introduction.

But what price being a little different these days? Around £69,000 it seems… There’s a Maserati parked on the driveway and I’m already excited…

More interesting than a 70s prog rock band, the Hyundai Genesis will never sell in huge numbers in the UK

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As an exercise in upgrading the brand image, the Hyundai Genesis does a decent enough job. It has set the ground nicely for the arrival next year of a new generation of Genesis cars that will be much more of a challenge to German rivals.

While this current Genesis is very easy on the eye and loaded with luxury, it won’t find many takers in the UK. This is largely due to the lack of a diesel engine version – and the enormous emissions from the 3.8-litre petrol engine.

You have to imagine that depreciation on a £47,000 Hyundai will be pretty hefty too. Quite possibly massive.

At least it’s a refreshing change from the BMW/Mercedes/Audi offerings that dominate the executive market. But come the day when you have to open your wallet, you know it’s going to have a German badge on the bonnet, don’t you?

The Hyundai Genesis is designed for roads the width of a football pitch – not ones in the UK

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You can forgive the soft suspension and boat-like handling of the Genesis if you take into account that the Hyundai is not designed for British roads – it’s primarily targeted at North America. Straight, dull roads about the width of a football pitch.

I wonder if there is anyone in the UK who is mad enough to have bought one instead of a BMW 5 Series, which is by far the better car for UK conditions. (except the Hyundai has a far better five-year guarantee, of course).

The real reason Hyundai has brought the Genesis to this country is to change the way we perceive the Korean brand. They want us to think upmarket when we utter the name – not just very good, value for money family cars.

And now we know why of course. A whole range of Genesis models will arrive over the next couple of years. Genesis will include a number of premium brand-style cars aimed squarely at German car buyers, of all shapes and sizes.

So what you are seeing here is the start of a whole new era for Hyundai. Hence the name perhaps…

The psychedelic door mirror downlights are a night-time treat in the Hyundai Genesis

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So my favourite feature on the Genesis isn’t the panoramic sunroof, or the air conditioned seats. I like the head-up display too but that isn’t it either.

What I really like about the big Hyundai are the door mirror lights that flash the name ‘Genesis’ down onto the road at night when you walk up towards the car. Cool.

Jaguar Land Rover do it on their top spec cars too. It’s pretty neat and just adds that touch of class.

Just be warned – it doesn;t work if you park on gravel. However, for a psychedelic effect of great note, try parking next to a big puddle. The reflection is brilliant!

The Princess and the Pea of driving in a Hyundai Genesis

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I’m starting to feel like the Princess and the Pea driving the Genesis. Here’s a big, luxury car – almost five metres long – that cossets passengers with air suspension and armchair seats.

In the back, you can electronically recline the seats. Back seat passengers sitting on the left can also remotely operate the front seat to give themselves more leg room. Clever.

Yet even with all these comforts and luxuries, there’s just something about the position of the driver’s seat that isn’t quite right, despite multiple electronic adjustments and lumbar supports.

I think it’s the angle of the seat back, or the way it has been sculpted. But after 300 miles in the big Hyundai yesterday, I just can’t find the perfect ‘BMW-style’ driving position…

The Hyundai Genesis takes you back to the future… if you fancy a 1990s Lexus LS that is

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The strangest thing. I found myself sat in the Hyundai’s executive fuel-burner this morning, on the long drive up to Leeds. I was heading north to interview the championship winning Yorkshire Cricket Team. Nice bunch of lads.

Anyway, somewhere around Leicester I had this huge sense of deja vu. What was it about the Genesis that took me back to the bad hair days of the 1990s?

I’ll tell you. The interior could have come straight from a Lexus LS. There is lashings of perforated leather (hot and air cooled seats), some rather naff wood veneer on the dash, and less than impressive plastics.

I couldn’t say there was anything wrong with the cabin but it felt and almost smelt old fashioned. Mercedes trim can be questionable these days but the Hyundai really isn’t premium feel.

This isn’t helped by a raft of buttons and dials that could have come from lesser Hyundai models. The sat nav is excellent – easy to use and logical – and there’s a stonking sound system.

However, I’m not going to pay £47k just for that pleasure…

Here comes another Genesis… The Hyundai one!

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How many Genesis can there be? Not the biblical tale, or the rock group but the car. Six months after launching the Genesis luxury saloon in the UK, Hyundai this week announced the new ‘Genesis’ brand.

A line-up of six models, all aimed at the luxurious end of the market. Just like Infiniti is linked to Nissan, Lexus to Toyota, Genesis will take on key German brands like Audi, Mercedes and BMW.

A new beginning? Well, we’ll have to wait and see.

For now, Car Couture has just taken delivery of the executive Genesis saloon. It’s packed with a 3.8 petrol engine, tons of executive kit and enough styling cues to worry Mercedes.

But is it all style and no substance? Join us for a week of reviews to find out. A day with Yorkshire County Cricket Team tomorrow, let’s see how it goes.

Attitude? The Skoda Yeti has all the appeal of a pile of stale underpants after a stag party

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It’s all about attitude. Some cars have it, others don’t. Take the Skoda Yeti. A perfectly sound motor, practical and, erm, worthy. Yet it has all the appeal of a pile of stale underpants after a stag party.

You don’t buy one to make a statement. You buy one because you’ve worked out the repayment figures, assessed secondhand values and know you can pack an awful lot of meaningless lifestyle stuff in the back.

On paper, the Yeti is a better car than the Mazda CX-3. On paper, you’d probably pick it every time. Except when you park the CX-3 beside it, the Yeti looks as prehistoric as it’s name.

The Mazda has cool, edgy styling, a slick profile and actually says you care about what you drive. Everybody else can buy their pants from M&S and drive a sensible Skoda.

Which driver are you?

Compact cross-overs without 4×4? Shouldn’t be allowed. We drive the new Mazda CX-3

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Yes, yes, yes, you’re always going to choose a Porsche 911 S Cabriolet over a compact crossover, right?

Well, temperatures dipped to -2 in the Cotswolds last night and this morning I had one of those bonkers dilemmas. Do I drive the 4×4 Mazda CX-3 to Silverstone, or my trusty 911?

Surprising as it might seem – and purely because I knew the backroad route I would take wasn’t salted – I picked up the  Mazda keyset.

And then I put them back down again. Because our CX-3 test car doesn’t actually have four-wheel drive. It’s one of those pseudo 4x4s, equipped with two-wheel drive only.

What I would probably have done is launch into a corner too fast in the CX-3 and become unstuck.

I’m not sure I’m cut out for compact crossovers without all-wheel drive. I mean, what’s the point? It looks like a 4×4, you can pay a little extra for a four-wheel drive version. So why bother with this model?